Standards and Expectations

By Joanna K. Harris

Joanna Harris is an author and blogger with a tremendous passion for God.  You can contact Joanna here.  For more on Joanna and her ministry, check out her website here.  There you can also find links to her other blogs.

I think sometimes we need to raise our standards and lower our expectations.

Let me explain.

Modern culture continually sends messages telling people to lower their standards and raise their expectations.

Example: "Just live together before you get married. Then you can find out if you're compatible and if the other person will make you happy."

Lowering of moral standards – devaluing purity and commitment. Raising of personal expectations – someone else is responsible for your happiness.

I believe that during my lifetime there's been a dangerous shift in both standards and expectations.

My parents' generation grew up with high standards and reasonable expectations for themselves, others, and life in general. They valued character and integrity. They didn't expect life to always be easy. They were prepared for hard work, sacrifice, and delayed gratification.

In today's world, most people have few, if any standards, and many unrealistic expectations.

I think it's time we get intentional about reversing this trend. It’s time to start practicing raised standards and lowered expectations.

Here are some practical areas I've thought about where we can apply this:

- Raise our standards of what we put into our bodies (leave unhealthy things and junk food behind), and lower our expectations that what we consume is supposed to make us feel good.

- Raise our standards of how we treat other people, and lower our expectations that we'll never have conflict or challenging relationships.

- Raise our standards of personal integrity, and lower our expectations that everything in life will come easily for us.

- Raise our standards of how we invest our time, and lower our expectations that we can do everything we want.

- Raise our standards of financial stewardship, and lower our expectations of what we think we need.

Ouch. Did any of those prick you a little as you read them? What other areas can you think of where this principle is needed?

I'm really excited about this concept. Yet, the thought of trying to apply it to my specific situation is a little daunting. And it probably should be.

I think too many of us, perhaps unconsciously, have adopted a mindset of "easier is better" or "if it feels good, do it." But Christ has called us to a completely different worldview and lifestyle. He calls us to the highest standard: His life living through us, and His choice of humble and self-less expectations. 

This life is not about me – my comfort, ease, happiness, or personal fulfillment. This life is about God's glory.

If we lower our standards and pursue unrealistic, selfish expectations, we’ll only end up unhappy, unfulfilled and wondering where our life went.

But the good news is that as we rely on God’s power and grace to live with His higher standards and Spirit-led expectations, God Himself fills us with His comfort, His joy and happiness, and sweet satisfaction in seeing His plans for us fulfilled. What could be better?

So what is God saying to you? Where is He calling you to raise your standards and lower your expectations?

I want to heed His call. Is it easy? No. But by God’s grace and Christ’s life in me, it is possible. And I believe it will be well worth it.

…we constantly pray for you, that our God may count you worthy of His calling, and that by His power He may fulfill every good purpose of yours and every act prompted by your faith. -2 Thessalonians 1:11

Therefore, holy brothers, who share in the heavenly calling, fix your thoughts on Jesus, the apostle and high priest whom we confess…let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. -Hebrews 3:1, 12:1-2

www.newlineministries.com

One of Those Weeks

By: Adam McClendon
www.newlineministries.com

 

Arrrgggghhhh.  Ever have one of those weeks where everything feels heavy, where your moods are as unpredictable as a cheap yo-yo, and you feel like a shaken bottle of champagne ready to be uncorked?

We’ve all been there, and lately, it seems that I’ve lived there.

How do we deal with it?  How do we “fix” this problem and get back on track?  After all, Jesus said that his yoke was easy and his burden was light (Matt 11:30).

Well, the answer is much more complicated as a whole than can be addressed here, but some reminders can help steady the boat.  A complication in this process often occurs when we spend so much energy trying to figure out whether these spiritual attacks or tests are coming from God or from the enemy.  The reality is that regardless of the source of the emotional upheaval in our lives, our responses are to be the same.  Here is a recommended approach.

First, we need to examine our lives for any habitual or blatant sins and repent if any are found.  Let’s be clear here.  Living in violation of our conscience results in emotional instability.  We cannot quench the Spirit and ignore our conscience and be left unaffected.  Intentional rebellion eats at our hearts like an aggressive cancer, robs us of joy, and produces incredible emotional volatility.

Second, we need to be faithful in the spiritual disciplines of Bible intake, prayer, and corporate worship.  Often, we don’t spend time in the word, prayer, or go to church, because we do not “feel” like it; however, in these times, that is the very place we regularly need to be.  We need to let God’s word settle in our hearts (Ps 119:11), we need to cry out to God more faithfully in prayer knowing that he is ultimately the object of our affections and the one we need (Heb 4:14-15), and we need faithfully to encourage others in the church and be encouraged by them (Heb 10:24-25).

Third, seek forgiveness and accountability.  Let’s be honest, when we feel this way, we can be obnoxious, inconsiderate, and mean.  We need to confess our sin and ask for forgiveness from our spouses, children, co-workers, or anyone else that we have hurt in this process.  We also need to seek a couple of people to hold us accountable to the fact that our feelings cannot be used as an excuse for outbursts.  We should also seek wisdom from them on better coping methods.

Fourth, we need to keep the “big 3” in check: exercise, diet, and sleep.  Our spiritual and physical lives are inevitably connected.  When we neglect or abuse our bodies, our spiritual life suffers right along with the physical neglect.  Exercise, diet, and sleep all impact our emotional states as well.  Be sure to exercise reasonably (2 or 3 times per week for between 30min and 1hr each), eat reasonably (be sure to eat enough, but not too much and reasonably healthy food), and sleep reasonably (too much sleep will add to depression and frustration, but too little will add to irritability).

Finally, stay the course.  Hey, the reality is that it takes time to cross the desert.  Sometimes, we just find ourselves in a tough season and we just need to set the sail and be faithful through the storm.  The season will pass.  We just need to be faithful and not allow our emotions or circumstances to serve as an excuse for wrecking our lives with sin and our relationships with anger.

Sure, there are a lot more factors involved and a lot of nuanced circumstances that might dictate additional courses of action, but as a whole, if we will keep these 5 things in view, we will find that the dawn will come more quickly than it would have otherwise.

Blessings to you as you seek to steady the boat and sail into the dawn.

www.newlineministries.com